Sellouts are Not Family
If I am related to someone closely and they are good to me I just do not get to
see them. It is a long story but it is true. From 1974 to 2008 my
and I were tricked and pushed into making trips to Southern California to see a
bunch of phonies.
They did not come to see us since I was in ninth grade. After that they
even would make trips a few times a
year through the same exact town we live in without seeing us at all.
They never made any effort go get to know us. We were like trip objects
to them. In fact in the 1990s I could tell they knew us about as much as people who had known us
a week. Near the end in 2008 we saw a "family video" they had made that had
probably 200 photos of them and maybe three of us. It was a movie made out
of photos. It was so lame and it was so obvious that we meant nothing to them. Heck I think the few photos of us were from twenty years previous.
What do you expect from a one sided "family" relationship. They talked always about being a "family" to the exclusion of us. Then
again they tied us up so much the last time we were down there in 2008 that
we had no chance to go to a family grave yard. That was the last
time we could go down there and we are never going back to that part of the
They were horrible gift givers but they expected perfect gifts from us.
They would blow up at us
over good gifts. Then again some of their gifts to us went straight to the
trash by 1998. I sure felt better during the first
birthday and Christmas cycle after they were gone.
I never miss them and they were a waste of time.
They expected us to come and see them regardless of work or school
responsiblities. When we dumped them it was like being really sick and
starting antibiotics. Speaking of that there was one time I had mono
really bad and I had been in urgent care twice in a week. They expected
me to drop everything and drive right down there like that. I had just
flown across the country and I was home just a week. I did not have the time
to drive 480 miles and then fly back across the country. I was expected to drive 480
miles to see them. They seriously blew up at us not long after a doctor pretty
much told me "lots of luck having kids." And a few days after that Kaiser
doctor told me that I found out he was arrested for raping his patients.
They added stress upon stress. And they
expected us to move down there at the drop of a hat. Also there was one
time they expected us to drive down there and my jaws were wired shut. That
was a high maintenance time in my life and I could not just stop anywhere
and eat. I had to put my food in a blender. And right after I ate I had to
get a water pick and toothbrush out or else or my teeth could rot! I had to
get regular food and put it in a blender. I sure was not going to be on the
road eight hours and drink milk shakes. They did not "forgive" us for that for years. I was in high school at that exact time and I could not
miss anything for that. That was for a 40th birthday of one of them and they were dumped
before my 40th birthday. They threw our gifts out from this incident. Also when I was nine they took us to an amusement park I could not stand. The rides were scary and I ended up throwing up after not too long. It did not bother them at all and they just kept on going since it was all about them. Now that this
has been over ten years ago I sit and think "I could have had tons of
photos from Corpus Christi to California." And "I could have gone to
some other part of the country instead." I wish I had I10 covered
strongly from Phoenix to San Antonio. I love Willcox, Arizona and
Benson, Arizona as much as Wells, Nevada. And the same for Lordsburg,
New Mexico and Sonora, Texas. I wanted a lot more variety of photos for my audience
They barely knew about my site or my travels because they never tried
to know us. They were not interested. As the years went on they
got worse and worse. I always figured it would be over with them at
some point. Deep down inside I never liked them. I got into genealogy because of this. I got
into genealogy in 2001 because I missed my ancestors. Our ancestors had
been good to us unlike these people. When I was growing up I could tell
that the other kids and adults I knew could have trouble with family
but not like what we ran into with these idiots. I hope no one on my
site goes through stuff like this ever. Also one time I wanted to meet with
someone with a similar site (Andy Field) in person. I was in Southern California but I
was too tied up to meet him. Also once they were gone I realized I had
changed more than any time in my life in a way. Their toxic crap was gone.
I said different things and life changed so much for the better. The
morning after we dumped them I noticed I had a hard time remembering them.
No one ever treated us the way they did. In general I do not mention them.